This article is part of the Replacing Movie Subtitles With Fighting Game Quips series.
As always, the subtitles below are unedited quips from actual fighting games. Today's quotes are from Variable Geo, Kaiser Knuckle, and Neo Geo Battle Coliseum.
I have used my bot to create Olive Garden commercials. This is a bot I have. Don't question it.
Following America's defeat in World War 3, allied forces uncovered a number of experimental weapon prototypes in the hotel-compound of Trump's loyalist Space Force army. Had the war continued just a few more months, these secret weapons would have changed the course of the war.
Are there arrows in Tomb Raider? "No. Absolutely not."
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.
Fighting game characters love to intimidate opponents with terrible dialog. These quips don't work as intended, but they do make movies way better when used as subtitles.